Possibly the final story 15/16

December 4, 2003

It was about a year ago that I remember watching a program on CNN. It was about Zimbabwe. I remember commenting to Mike, who was tending bar with me at the time (it was a very slow Sunday) that that was one African country that I would not be visiting. Too dangerous. Lord knows what would happen to a mzungu there.

I found out while I was here that it is actually very safe. Used to be the jewel of Africa as far as travellers went. The problem is they have a really shit government. Now I know that’s a common statement for Africa but really, Mugabe is a twat. He’s killing everyone. The inflation is so high that prices change daily…but wages stay the same. Now, if you’re traveling on the Yankee dollar, which I am, you’re laughing. It’s cheap as hell. Right now $1 = $5800 Zim on the black market (the safe-in-stores-not-the-streets-go-straight-to-jail-or-lose-it-all black-market). You can live like a queen for virtually nothing. Mind you, the bank rate is something like $800 Zim to the dollar but who’s stupid enough to trade on that.

Did something crazy and went to a place called Antelope Park. Had heard about it from a French girl I met in Zanzibar. She had worked/volunteered there raising lion cubs and of course, I was very intrigued by this. Obviously, I never made it there for employment because I was stuck in Malawi but I was still curious about the place. When I got to Harare, I met up with a Danish couple that was going. Thought why not. Am I glad I went…and never worked there. It’s basically an Overland truck amusement park. Lots of money for all kinds of ‘fun activities’. You know, riding elephants, walking with lions, playing with cubs, blah, blah, blah. But the reality of the place: first, they pay their staff pitiful amounts and no food or transport back to town. This means they have to walk 7 km to and from the park from the nearest transport. Oh, the mzungus who ‘volunteer’ get room and board, use of all the amenities (i.e. the pool and hot showers) and $30USD a month. The African staff gets $33, 800 Zim a month. A loaf of bread costs $2800Zim. A term of school for a child costs $45 000Zim not including uniforms or supplies. You do the math. Not so nice when the place pulled in $2000 USD in less than a hour with one elephant.

Oh, I can say even more. They tried to fuck us over with general costs. We kept asking for the price list and no one would give it to us. We had been told a double would cost $10US and it turned out to cost $24…a person! I didn’t pay. I paid $10. They were nice enough to admit they were wrong.

Anywho, I did get to play with some lion cubs, for free. It was fun, as you could imagine. But we spent no more money than we were forced to at this….place.

Ok, one last bad Zim story. There’s a man staying at the backpackers we’re at. He’s owned and run a safari camp called Hippo Pools for the past 20 odd years. He’s a white Zimbabwean. He was invaded a few weeks ago. They almost killed him, but stopped because an American tourist was with him. Now they have his place, have destroyed it; not that he can get in and the police won’t help (hmmmm, wonder why?). Now he’s trying to get his life back.

This is a very sad difficult country.

But oddly, the people are lovely. Very friendly, helpful, great English, clever. Amazing. And the tourists are staying away in droves. It’s very western here too. You can really see the British influence. You can even order pizza delivery in Harare. There’s even skyscrapers here! It’s crazy! Where am I?

Saw Victoria Falls. They were very impressive. Water, spilling over a cliff and only $20 USD to see them. I would say they were nicer than Niagara Falls though….

Get this: it seems I am remembered by my fellow travel companions for, of all things, my potty mouth. That’s right. That’s’ what people remember me for. Hmmmm, think I should maybe clean up my mofoho vocabulary?

Did manage to see some more of Malawi. Spent my bday in Nkhata Bay (thanks to all for the bday wishes!), then left for Senga Bay where my friend Richard is from. Chilled out on the beach for a few days, even met up with Jan, who I traveled with in Tanzania and her boyfriend Tom. We sadly parted ways for one last time and Richard I headed to Cape McClear to find out the difference between that and Nkhata Bay. Phil and I have found that you’re either an Nbay person or a Cape McClear person. I’m still an Nbay person.

And now I’m getting prepared to head back to Mozambique for some sun, sand and manta rays before racing to Cape Town for my flight home. It’s crazy. I can’t believe it’s been a year.
Some things I’ll miss:
◦Coke in a glass bottle. Man, it tastes so much better!
◦The laid back way of life here. I’m so not looking forward to being hectic again.
◦Friendly people.
◦The odd African habits that I can’t explain at all.
◦The heat. I finally have gotten used to it.
I keep meeting Africans who complain about the heat. I think we should switch places!

Oh, I can’t do this list right now…
It’s too hot to think :)

Hope all is well!
See ya soon,
love thi